Arts & Entertainment

Rant

Movie Trailers and Why They Suck

Posted 20 months ago|9 comments|729 views
At least the poster is good.
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I think they ("they" being the evil movie marketing hacks) should stop showing trailers, with the hammer-thump-stomp advertising, being particularly invasive in the States.

The sad thing is, when I see film trailers, I just know what the film is going to be like. One could see it as an advantage, since, if it's crap (which it usually is) I save myself the money, right? Like with "Eat Pray Love".

I suppose I am not qualified, justified nor can be vindicated in my initial judgment as I still haven't seen the movie. Waiting till it appears on cable is soon enough for me. However, hearing various reviews by my intimate circle of trusted film critics (Dana Stevens, Stephen Metcalff and Julia Turner of Slate and the one and only Dr. K aka Mark "Quif" Kermode) I feel confident clinging to my initial gut reaction to that particular sop weep barf extravaganza, penned by a poor rich lady, looking for the meaning of life. Gah.

Next case-in-point: "The American". George Clooney. On heavy rotation in the weeks leading up to the September 3rd release, the strategy obviously did some good. The "European Thriller" with American movie star magic won the box office that weekend. The takes weren't huge and the competition was not intimidating, nevertheless, it worked.

I am a George Clooney fan. He's got charm, sex appeal, the works. But, honestly, seeing the trailer, time and time again, I just thought it was dead boring. And George Clooney's presence did nothing, absolutely nothing to up the "Am I intrigued?" factor. In fact, I found the attempt to morph him into some angst-plagued assasin more irritating than anything else. The trailer highlights his buffness and tattoos, either blatantly copying the "Cape Fear" Robert De Niro I am a really mean mother****er thing, or an homage, however you want to view that. Problem is, George Clooney is not scary. And even "something bad is gonna happen" music won't change that. Nor big fat tattoos dancing on the muscular rear view of Mr. "I took this job because its not far from my awesome Italian Villa" Clooney, doing pull ups.

Honestly, it's disappointing to be right all the time. Seriously. I want to be surprised, blown away, intrigued. Of course, if I did go and actually see the movie, something or other might surprise me, but a surprise worth 12 bucks and two hours? Not that I am that busy or anything. And I would be supporting my local cinema, which is a good thing, always.

One question that arose during the Slate Culture Gab Fest's review of "The American" was this: Would it have been a better movie with another leading actor? The consensus leaned toward a "no, not really".

My take: at least it would have been more interesting to see someone different. We know what George Clooney can and cannot do. He doesn't do deep. At least not in that cliched dark Euro-deep trenched and twisted way. Not like a Vincent Cassel or the of constant inner turmoil suffering Ralph Fiennes easily conveys with one furrowed brow. George cannot do that. It's a no sale. Not buying. Nope. Take it back.

Which brings me to the idea: how about a money-back guarantee? If the film is crap, we get our money back.

As far as the trailer dilemma goes: eagerly-awaited movies often have the best scenes in the trailer, making it redundant to see the two-hour version. Bad comedies (like the recent staggeringly awful "Dinner For Schmucks" ) display the three best jokes, if that, in the trailers as well. So why bother?

Less money for advertising, more money for better scripts. Now that's a revolutionary thought.
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COMMENTS
Alex Layton
Alex Layton
 Administrator
Puyallup, WA
20 months ago: I don't know... I enjoyed this trailer...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1kqqMXWE...
20 months ago: and the movie could even be better ;)
20 months ago: Time for you to get your script finished so we can all enjoy a good action, drama, comedy. Be sure and leave the tear-jerker parts for your next try.
20 months ago: Damn right SH. No tear jerkers for me......thriller comedy drama is perfect. And on the rocky road to production. No trailer ;). Actually, I like trailers. Its just, recently, the trailers have been better than the movies. At least for the most part.
Ian Forbes
Ian Forbes
San Diego, CA
20 months ago: I actually avoid trailers as much as possible so I go into screenings with as little info as possible, though sometimes that's just impossible (even in a DVR world). My main complaint is that they tell the audience what's going to happen: The guy is sad. He meets a girl. They fall in love. They have a fight. They make up. They all live happily ever after.

Or worse, they completely misconstrue the genre. Speaking of "The American", one might think it has action scenes ... well, 90% of the action is in the trailer. It's really a moody film where we get to watch Dr. Ross sit, drive, drink and sit some more (though I would argue it'd be better with a different actor and a script that didn't change the nationality of the main character).
20 months ago: Clooney did one of the worst "Batmans" ever. The fact that the script was gosh awful didn't help either.

"The Fantastic Mr. Fox" was Clooney at his best.

20 months ago: I recently saw Clooney's Batman. IT really was aweful. Have yet to see Fantastic Mr. Fox.

And yes, avoiding trailers is good albeit difficult in the States cause you get blasted at every turn. But if you can and do, at least the surprise, whichever way it goes, is.well.....a surprise.
20 months ago: This one bucks the system.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2igjYFoj...

Check it out.
20 months ago: Thanks! FMF is on my movie channel. will watch it this evening for sure.

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