I am man, and as a man i do things that come naturally to me, and if you don't like it, then **** you.
As a man, I feel entitled to scratch my balls in public on a humid summers day, sounds gross to you women, but guess what, our ball sacks sweat all the same as the rest of our body, and when they sweat, they not only get itchy, they stick to your leg, making it feel awkward as we walk, and can result in chaffing.
I get drunk, why? because its fun, there's no other level to it than that for most men
I eat food that doesn't agree with my digestive tract because it tastes good, and as a man, I'm willing to make that sacrifice, and walk around the rest of the day with gas or heartburn or the runs, because as a man I decisively decided it was worth it.
Indecisive men shouldn't exist, because men are ancestrally the hunter, meaning we have to make decisions quick and deal with the consequences, which is why we have wise old men, so you can listen, and when you come across a similar situation needing a quick decision, then you can make the better one.
Men like sports, because they are, when all boiled down, a civilized version of war, the best of the best of two different groups going at it to see who is better, and as men, we primordially feel the urge to do this, but since most of us aren't the best, we settle for watching.
As men we feel the need to prove our manliness to not only ourselves, but to others (particularly females and our friends). We do this through sports, fist fights and other such pointless competitions, even against some of the most feared animals on the planet (hence the appeal of large game hunting)
I've unfortunately noticed a sever disease is plaguing the men of today, this disease is called ****assness. many people suffer from it. The symptoms of this terrible disease are indecisiveness, backing down from a fairly reasonable to only moderately unreasonable challenge, and not sacking up and taking responsibilities for your actions, such as supporting your family or taking blame for how your life turned out.
Join me fellow men, in learning the way of the authoritative **** slap, for when delivered right, is the only know cure for ****assness, though the **** slap doesn't have to be physical (it can be verbal as well) I prefer the physical one, as demonstrated to perfection in the movie Head of State (a mediocre film at best) in the scene when Bernie Mac exits the train, and just starts slapping the dog **** out of people.
This plague needs to be stopped, take preventative measures, **** slap your children (it works the same as a vaccine) and if done right, then they will never suffer from this terrible disease.