Rant

I NEVER EVER WANT A DAUGHTER!!!!

Posted 41 months ago|13 comments|846 views

TAGS

parenting , daughter , children , sex , adolescence

Written by

TravDog321
Sanibel, FL

I NEVER EVER WANT A DAUGHTER. EVER, EVER, EVER. Clear enough??? In my restaurant and during holiday shopping this season, I see that fourth grade seems to be when daughters start insisting on brand-name clothing that looks like it is for PROMISCUOUS WOMEN! I know the Moms are buying the clothes that the girls want, because all Moms want their daughters to be more popular than they were when they were kids. This is simply not smart parenting.

I remember high school. I only graduated six years ago. Let me put it this way: By the time I was in sixth grade I already saw sleazy (loser-type usually, but sometimes really popular) eighth and ninth grade boys preying on fifth and sixth grade girls. I'm talking alcohol and behind the scenes sexual activities. By the time I was in ninth grade, I saw the same type guys continuing to prey on your daughters. Usually by this time, the certain types of girls that were preyed upon in middle school, see entering high school as a way to be openly defiant to parents. "Yes I'm fourteen and I'm having sex with seniors on the football team." "Plus I drink and do drugs: Try to stop me!!!"

This is when they are introduced to hard drugs too. Yes, early in high school. All across America. Luckily for most, doing a little coke or X is a short phase (guys give them the drugs free usually), but the "popular" girls keep drinking more and "becoming more experienced" (having sex with more dudes). By the end of middle-school, most "normal" kids have been drunk a few times and KNOW HOW TO HIDE IT FROM YOU. I love sex and violence in movies, but that's another reason that I never want a daughter. Electronic media must play SOME role in adding fuel to the fire. Plus, having a daughter would RUIN countless television shows and movies for me.

I know quite a few "girls", that are adults now, that learned that being "popular" with the boys happens by mastering the hardcore techniques in internet pornography. Once again, having a daughter would ruin my ability to enjoy occasional pornography and recognize it as a male-bonding/sex-ed tool. And as a nice cure for boredom, or to spice up my ADULT sex life. (Editors of the site please do not close my account. Almost EVERY man looks at porn.) Also, much pornography is just unacceptable and no girl should ever be DOING those things, let alone PRACTICING them.

Also, girls are harder to say NO too. I would probably cave in on anything my daughter wanted if she was cute enough. I know NEXT TO NOTHING about parenting (I'm twenty-three, single, and have no children), but I know this: America is not watching its daughters. Wake up and get to REALLY KNOW your daughters. Being a YES MOM or YES DAD seems to make them worse. Too much discipline is VERY BAD too. Those jokes about preacher's daughters: They're not jokes.

Abstinence is completely asinine to teach. America's so messed up now that I have no idea what you should be telling your daughters. I just NEVER EVER want one. Forget about the economy for ONE FREAKING SECOND and see what your kids are up to, at least. And screw not searching their rooms. If they're under eighteen and living in the house THAT YOU PAY FOR: Sorry, they do not have a right to privacy. Damn, I'm an agnostic so I cannot even say something like "God give you strength". You'll need to be tough as nails with a sugar coating to raise daughters that become "normal" women, and I have no idea how you are going to do that, or what constitutes normal these days.

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alphabetsoup

41 months ago: It sounds like you don't want a wife that doesn't know how to raise a daugther. In America, everyone ones needs to learn you reap what you sow. If you are caught up in materialistic things, your children will be too. I grew up with semi-strict parents, and I didn't get the name brand clothes. I might have gotten picked on, but I learned who my real friends were. Additionally, I grew up where many of my peers didn't. I went to school where the kids parents had a lot of money, and their parents spoiled them. My parents had money, but you know what they did, they saved it and while we did without, they and I will retire early. I had to earn my keep at our house and learned to be an adult. I'm now 24, very successful, own my own house and my own car(which I bought myself not with daddy's money) and while I was picked on, my success is my revenge. You know what mose of my classmates are doing, they are still in school(and aren't close to graduating) and they are still living on their parents money. Their parents spoiled them and they are getting sick of their freeloading children, but they don't know how to give tough love. You can have a daugther, you just need to know how to be a parent and not a friend. They may hate you at the time, but trust me they will thank you later.

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Jodi Schatz
Kirkland, WA

41 months ago: I think I agree! Well, with most of what you said (some of that was just plain strange;)! But you do have some good points....I have 2 boys (1 yr & 3 yr) and quite honestly was hoping for a girl on my second, but now I realize I think having boys will be just fine. I think it will be much easier to teach them to be respectful of girls than it would be to teach girls to protect themselves from all the pervs out there! I am one of 3 girls in my family who all made it through the teenage years pregnancy/STD/& addition free! So I know it is possible to raise good girls who aren't brats or promiscuous, it just takes a loving home & getting them in sports and activities that give them the self esteem they need to make good choices. I'm thinking the same things will work for boys (I hope) to make good choices, to treat people well and to say NO to all the crazies out there!

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TravDog321
Sanibel, FL

41 months ago: I don't even know if I want to have kids. Ever. I'm just not sure. Of course I'm also only 23. It's just that I've done a lot of things that would give me a heart attack or a stroke if I caught my kids doing them. But then again, children make and learn from: mistakes. When I wrote the essay I was primarily thinking about how many little girls I grew up with, that have such problems now, or are just plain witches (with a B up front) because of no discipline in their childhood or adolescence (or too much).

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glitchypetpeeve89
Auburn, NY

41 months ago: Children are human copy machines if the parents are materialistic and don't teach them any moral values then nor will the children. If the parents don't take an active part in their childs life then of course they are going to end up like that. My father was a single parent for a while and he raised me; I was born when he was eighteen he didn't know the first thing about parenting because as far as I know there isn't any manual about raising a child.You just have to know what you want to your child to turn out to be and how to help your child turn into that without over parenting because I believe that is possible too. It is a balance that has to be figured out. I am not an expert by any means I am only 19 and not having a child yet because personally I don't think I am ready. That is another thing too if you don't think you are ready for childern then that is ok too. Some people a just not ready to be parents not everyone has to have children.

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TravDog321
Sanibel, FL

41 months ago: Thanks for the discussion Siempre, but your spelling, grammar, and syntax need quite a bit of work for me to get past their errors and to your good ideas. Plus, boys and girls are not the same and should not be treated the same except when it comes to most workplaces and other LEGAL areas. I mean do you really want your daughter choosing tackle football over cheerleading? Do you want her to be a multimillionaire workaholic lawyer that never sees her kids? They cannot be raised the same. Biological differences that have behavioral significance (through hormones) just will not allow it.

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glitchypetpeeve89
Auburn, NY

41 months ago: The very fact that we raise children differently is exactly what causes the problem. Young boys are raised to be extremely masculine: not to cry, to be tough, and to do other masculine things that satisfies there testosterone filled bodies. Were as little girls are taught to be frilly, soft, and dependant on someone else. But when it comes to child rearing societies stereotypical differences between the sexes it should not come into play when you are raising a child. If a girl wants to play football and a boy wants to cheerlead; what should it matter when it comes to raising them to be responsible adults that contribute to society instead of taking away from it?

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Francesca

41 months ago: I feel I should add something, finally. I think that parents are the ones who are at fault for raising daughters who are promiscuous drug addicts with a smoking problem. Everyone I knew, when growing up, was not afraid to try something. I knew a few alcoholics. I knew a few promiscuous people, but it was from both sides of the gender issue.

I should add, I was raised to 'not cry' and to 'be tough' as a girl. I was also taught how to wear heels and a pair of pantyhose. I seriously have issues with people who think that different sexes are different. But I also have issues with people who think that men and women are perfectly capable of doing the 'same exact thing'. I still don't know of a man (the transsexual man excluded) who can get pregnant. So that makes us intrinsically different.

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TravDog321
Sanibel, FL

41 months ago: I don't care about gender. All I'm saying is that there seem to be a whole lot more "normal people" from my parents' (Dad's 60, Mom's 53) generation. People 35 and under seem to be much more materialistic, conceited, and stereotypical. There seem to be more robot workaholics and people with psychological problems. Maybe they were always there and previous generations just didn't talk about them but not every problem gets better if you talk about it. How much action one takes to better oneself and living without hypocrisy are how I judge character.

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Meekah

40 months ago: Oh yah, you don't want a daughter because they ask for those clothes... I don't want a son if that is how they act. You can just not buy the clothes for the daughter, but it is harder to prevent a son from doing such things that you mentioned when those activities are done outside of the home.

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