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Film Review: Jonah Hex

Posted 20 months ago|4 comments|593 views
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Written by
Ian Forbes
San Diego, CA
To satisfy my own ego, this film review will be done on a word per minute of runtime basis (80 if you're counting) … beginning … now:

In "Jonah Hex", Josh Brolin plays a slightly supernatural civil war veteran bent on revenge against John Malkovich, who's responsible for his family's death.

What should be a simple, fun action flick about revenge (sporting only 9 minutes of Megan Fox's supple physique), is instead an exercise in being bored.

Unless you're experimenting on how quality of time spent relates to length of time elapsed, "Jonah Hex" is best left off your radar and earns a 1.5 out of 5.

- This review courtesy of The Sobering Conclusion.
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COMMENTS
20 months ago: I never liked the comic books either.

The commercials made it look somewhat interesting, but I'm definitely taking a pass.

Thanks.
Ian Forbes
Ian Forbes
San Diego, CA
20 months ago: I never read the books but if the movie (and your comment) is any indication of them, I'm not missing anything and will move on. I was so bored that I counted out those 9 minutes of Megan Fox screen time so I had something to do - not because I enjoyed her "acting".
SamGee
SamGee
West Columbia, TX
19 months ago: The Jonah Hex comics were a campy and often creepy guilty pleasure: at a time when most western comics were TV squeaky clean, Hex dished up a healthy dose of fatal violence and anti-hero chic, sometimes combined with a funky occult vibe that made late night flashlight reading a shiver inducing prospect. The artwork in the comic was visually stunning as well, as the artists plucked "co-stars" from movies and TV with regularity: the villain might resemble Lee Marvin or Eli Wallach (even Bob Dylan made a cameo..)
all uncredited, of course. The end result was 30 something pages of escapist spaghetti western featuring a scarred Eastwood-esque hero (Think Two Face meets High Plains Drifter) that showed up at local grocery stores once a month, back in the simpler days, before the big bookstores and comic shops became a middle american staple. Parents who were judicious about their youngsters reading matter might let such a book pass: after all, it was approved by the comics code. How bad could it be?
I was not happy with the run time, the plot, or the casting (Brolin and Fox? Really?), but I saw it anyway. It wasn't good, but it was better than 90% of the turgid crap H-wood seems to generate these days. Way better than "wicki wicki Wild Wild West", at least. If you go in with no expectations, its a predictable and reasonably entertaining ride.
19 months ago: Part of it may be that I was never really into westerns at the time JH was in comics. I've grown to love shows like Gunsmoke, Bonanza, Big Valley, The Rifleman and a host of others.

Could be I'd have a different opinion if I read the comics now. You make them sound really great and so I'm guessing that maybe I missed something.

I was always more into Spider-Man, Hulk, Avengers, Defenders, Iron Man, X-Men, FF, etc.

You sound like my kind of guy. Will probably get the movie from the library when it comes out on DVD just to check it out based on what you've added. Thanks.

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