99ers Know Necrophagous NWO Nihilists Need Our Corpses
UNA Sources has learned that New World Order nihilists have been digging up the corpses of recently deceased 99ers in order to consume their decomposing organs and body parts.
Apparently, the psychological distress endured by 99ers as they suffered needlessly imbued their body tissues with an enhanced flavor that necrophagous tyrants and dictators around the world consider a delicacy, and are now paying top dollar for on the black market.
As a result, President Obombasta has plans to step up the production of 99er corpses in an effort to supply the demand, and thereby fill his war chest with the necessary funds to finance World War III and the subsequent Apocalypse.
Rumors have surfaced, however, that President Obombasta has become addicted to the sweet meat of 99er corpses, and is eating up most of the profits.
Blight House insiders have revealed that President Obombasta prefers to snack on the rotting hearts 99ers, most likely because he lacks one of his own.
99ers wishing to donate their bodies to be eaten by international necrophilic gangsters are encouraged to contact their local representatives to learn how they too can help fund World War III, and become inactive participants in Armageddon.
99ers Know Necrophagous NWO Nihilists Need Our Corpses
Pastor Dinary